tired of police standing in the road. Nostop car and says, \'Please show money!\'

Plūmīte anatomy lesson the teacher asks:
- Children, give me a human organ, which can rise and fall of ten.
Children sačukstas. Nobody raises their hands. They will not hear such as \"hi-hi\" and \"ha-ha.\"
The teacher became angry:
- For your reference, ten-fold increase and decrease can only pupil of the eye, but your \"hi-hi, ha-ha\" - a maximum of two and a half times.

dispute about who is in love.
Professor:
- Love is a disease from which a person enters the bed.
Doctor:
- What now for the disease, if no one wants to be treated? No,
Love is work.
Director:
- What about the way it works when the main body of standing? No, love is
process.
Lawyer:
- What now is the process where both sides are satisfied? No,
Love is an art.
Painter:
- What now for the art, if it can be anybody? No, love is
science.
Professor:
- What now for the science, if a student can, but I will not?

- You know some new joke?
- No.
- What do the internet cut off?

Anglers sits at the edge of the pond:
-Imagine dreamed last night that the next meeting itself Pamela Anderson. And close to any living soul!
-What happened?
I caught three-pound fish. . .
-Well, well beyond what was it?
-Oh, she finally neķērās.

- Let\'s go fishing!
- Surely I\'m not. . .
- What is there to know how to grow. Pour and drink

- How many lawyer jokes are there?
- Only three. . . All other events are true.

There are only two problems associated with the lawyer satire:
First Lawyers do not consider that they are funny!
The second The other does not believe that they are jokes!

lawyer dies and arrives at the gates of paradise. In front of thousands of people already waiting in line to see St. Peter\'s just. To his surprise, a lawyer sees the Sun. Peter leaves his seat at the gate and comes miss the big waiting queue directly to a lawyer, and his cordial greetings. Sun. Peter takes a lawyer at hand and leads to your desk and comfortable chair apsēdina.
-Thank you for the attention given to me, but what makes me so special?
Saint Peter says:
-I counted all the hours that you are instructed to bill customers, and by my calculation you\'re 193 years old.

clashes blind rabbit and blind snake.
The snake will feel rabbit and says:
-You\'re soft and fluffy and you have atkārušās ears. You certainly are a bunny rabbit.
Rabbit will feel a snake and says:
-You\'re a slimy, small eyes and crawl. You definitely have a lawyer.

- How can you know that a lawyer is lying?
- His lips are moving.

mother with her little daughter visiting grandma\'s grave. Walking through the cemetery, the little girl asked:
-Mother, or have disposed of two people in one grave?
-Of course not, dear, - the responsibility of a mother - but why are you asking it?
-On the headstone was written \"Here resting a lawyer and an honest man ...\"

Bill Gates and Štirlics watched as fascists burning books.
- Censorship - sadly thinks Štirlics.
- Fight the pirates - Bill happy.

father - a doctor warned her son:
- If you ever mīlējoties with a girl, you notice that her eyes shining feverishly, his lips are moist and sensitive, but her body trembling aspen as a page, flee immediately! It has malaria!

Two police patrol car. One wonders:
- You can check that turning the creator is working on your side?
A second look at the window and says:
- Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no. . .